ST MARY'S
C OF E CHURCH, FAWDON
TIME TO SAY GOODBYE
During this difficult time we want to help you
to say goodbye to those you love.
FUNERALS
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During this time many people are unable to mark the passing of someone's life in the usual way.
While funerals are still going ahead in Crematoriums and Cemeteries, which our Church of England clergy can take for you, we are aware that many people cannot currently attend funerals, either because they are shielding or because numbers at funerals are currently restricted.
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On this page you will find the resources which we have put together for you to help mark someone's life and say goodbye at home.
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Additionally, if you would appreciate an online-service or one over the phone we can help with this. Please simply call Rev'd Malcolm on 0191-295-4768 or email us.
IDEAS TO HOLD A SERVICE AT HOME
If you are not able to go to a funeral service you may find it helpful to take some time to hold a service at home
to remember and pray for the person who has died. You might find it helpful to do the following:
CONNECT
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Find out what time the funeral service will be held and choose to pray at the same time if you can.
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​Send a card to tell family members that you'll be with them in spirit praying at home.​
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Ask someone who can't be at the funeral to join you on the phone or over the internet.
PREPARE
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Create a focus for yourself, perhaps with some flowers, a candle, a cross, and a picture of the person who has died.
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Choose which prayers and readings from this site (and others) you want to use in advance so that you have what you need and feel calm.​
PAY YOUR RESPECTS
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If the funeral cortege will pass by where you live, you might like to stand outside and see it pass.
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Even if you won't see the cortege, you might find it helpful to stand for a minute's silence to remember the person who has died at the time of the funeral.
REFLECT
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Write some reflections about the person to read during your service. This might be like a eulogy, but could also be a poem, a letter, or a list of thank you's about the person's life.
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Think about sharing your reflections with someone. Sharing helps us in our grief.
KEEP PRAYING
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Not just on the day of the funeral, but on the surrounding days, you might like to pray for all those who are grieving.
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You could do this by lighting a candle at the same time in the days leading up to the funeral.
BE GENTLE
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Be gentle with yourself and others as you grieve. Grief affects us all in different ways and there is no way you should be feeling.
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Reach out for help if you need it.
RESOURCES FOR YOUR SERVICE
POEMS
Here is a selection of Poems often chosen for funerals. They are read by members of St Mary's Congregation
She is Gone
by David Harkins
Read by Marjorie
He is Gone
by David Harkins
Read by Rima
If Roses Grow in Heaven
by Kirsten Preus
Read by Marjorie
The Day God Called
You Home
Anonymous
Read by Rima
Death is Nothing At All
by Henry Scott Holland
Read by John
GUIDED REFLECTION
Often at Funerals, we take the time to remember and reflect on the life of the person who has died.
Use this Listen to the guided reflection below to help you give thanks for the life of the person who you are remembering today.
The reflections leads into some short prayers for the person who has died and all who grieve.
Do Not Hurry
Listen to this short Poem about walking with grief by Andy Raine
PSALMS
Here is a selection of Psalms often chosen for funerals. They are read by members of St Mary's Congregation
Psalm 23
Read by Maureen
Revised English Translation
Psalm 42
Read by Annie
NRSV Translation
Psalm 139
Read by Jackie
NRSV Translation
PRAYERS
Light a Candle
Sadly, due to the restrictions, we cannot currently invite you into our church building to pray.
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You may, however, like to light a candle at home or to click below to light a candle online.
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Prayers
Listen to these short prayers
for those who have died,
those who are grieving
and those who have helped us.
The Lord's Prayer
Join in with the Lord's Prayer
BIBLE READINGS
Here is a selection of Bible Readings often chosen for funerals. They are read by members of St Mary's Congregation
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
Read by Margaret
NRSV Translation
Romans 8:31-end
Read by Jenny
Good News Translation
John 14:1-6
Read by Jackie
NRSV Translation
BEREAVEMENT RESOURCES
Saying goodbye to those we love and care about is one of the most difficult things we have to do in life, and it is increasingly difficult during the challenging times we are currently facing.
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RESOURCES FOR YOURSELF
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Many people find it very helpful to talk with others about how they are feeling. Often talking to a close friend or family member feels best, but if you would like some more support there are more resources available through At A Loss and Cruise Bereavement. You may also like to Contact Us at St Mary's.
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SUPPORTING OTHERS
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If you know someone who has been bereaved and are wondering what you can do to help, you might find the video below, produces by At A Loss a helpful guide.
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SUPPORTING CHILDREN
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It is really important that we also take time to support children who are bereaved. There are lots of resources and stories out there to help and we can especially recommend Water Bugs and Dragon Flies for young children.
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One of the most important things though is to include children in the family's grieving and to ensure they know that it is good and fine to talk about the person who has died and how they feel. Making a memory jar together can really help with this. Watch our video below with instructions about how to make a memory jar.
